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106453: He does not take his mother to the Sacred Mosque because he fears for her, but she goes with the driver


A person is asking about his mother who loves to do good deeds, but she fasts and prays at the night a lot, which makes her tired and ill. Doctors have advised her but she did not listen. So he does not take her to the sacred masjid objecting to her exhausting herself, so she just asks the driver to take her. What is your opinion about what they are doing?.

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not prescribed nor is it required for a person to obey Allaah by doing acts of worship that cause him hardship, because when ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘Aas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) that he prayed qiyaam at night and did not sleep, and he fasted by day and did not break his fast, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to him: “Your Lord has a right over you, your self has a right over you and your family has a right over you, so give each one his rights.” Narrated by Muslim (1159). A man’s self is a trust that is given to him, and he must take proper care of it. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Take on only as much effort as you are able to, for Allaah does not get tired but you get tired.” And if a person is doing something obligatory, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to ‘Imraan ibn Husayn (may Allaah be pleased with him): “Pray standing, and if you cannot then sitting, and if you cannot then lying on your side.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (1117). When the Sahaabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) raised their voices in dhikr, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to them: “Be gentle with yourselves” (narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2992), i.e., do not be hard on yourselves, walk in a tranquil manner as the people walk on grass, because when people walk on grass, they walk slowly and do not rush, so that the camels can have the opportunity to graze.  

We say to this woman –whom we ask Allaah to increase in virtue and the desire to obey Him – that she should be moderate in worshipping Allaah in accordance with what is prescribed in the sharee’ah of Allaah, and she should not overburden herself. She should fear Allaah concerning herself and not be harsh on herself by fasting or praying qiyaam too much, or in other ways. 

As for riding with the driver on her own, this is haraam, because it is not permissible for a woman to be alone in the car with a man who is not her mahram, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man should be alone with a woman” (narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5233). This prohibition is general in meaning. As for travelling, no woman should travel without a mahram, even if there is someone else with her. So there are two issues here: Being alone with a man, which is haraam whether one is at home or travelling, and travelling, which is haraam unless one has a mahram. 

So this woman is committing something haraam for the sake of doing something that is not obligatory for her. 

With regard to the son’s refusal to take her to the Sacred Mosque, if his intention is to make her give up the idea, then this is good. But the problem is that she is insisting on going, so I think that he should not refuse so long as if he does not go, she will ask the driver to go with her, and he is not a mahram. What I think is that he should not refuse, if she is insisting on going. End quote. 

Majmoo’ Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, Fataawa al-Siyaam (127-130).
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