I wanted my wife to attend the ceremony of my sister’s nikkah but she said that she cannot come as she had some issues with the authorities (my in-laws in Kuwait were black listed due to expiry of my brother in law’s residency for a long time) my wife informed me about this but I did not believe her under the circumstances and got very angry with her and thought that she was making an excuse. My anger was outrageous and I have a previous history of going nuts due to anger.
The situation was that in front of my family members who were trying to calm me down I uttered the words “if she didn’t come on nikkah divorce (3 times) I was so infuriated that I did not know at the time the words which were coming out of my mouth didn’t even remember what I was saying, due to extreme anger, without knowing the meanings, and its effect, I uttered the above words.
After the people around me realised what I had uttered and made me aware of the situation, my elder brother called some mufti sahib, on that time Mufti sahib said that its talaq e bain. One Divorce has taken place. I was in shock that this was not what I meant; divorce was far from my mind I was having a happy life with her and just wanted to express my anger.
We called and informed my in laws of the situation. They were shocked as well and they tried to send my wife back with in this time period but she could not exit on account that her entire family would have to exit with her for good plus they’ll arrest her and then deport her. They tried their level best to make it possible but there were some concerned officers who were not working because of Muharram which delayed the process. Mean while one of mufti sahib informed us that three divorces are affected. We were shocked to learn that. They tried a lot, used all of their references and resources but they didn’t get the exit till Nikkah (we could not delay nikkah or make it an engagement as we had pressure from boy’s family).
I have the proof for that my father in law got the visa on 25th of December 2011 and my wife got visa on 27th of December 2011.
My question is , please answer: 1. I divorced in extreme anger without knowing the words coming out my mouth and I am ready to swear on it.
2. My in laws tried to send my wife but she could not make it on time.
3. I believed that she was lying to me whereas she was telling the truth.
If this situation is as you describe, that when you uttered the word of divorce you were not really aware of what you were saying because of severe anger, to the extent that you did not remember what you had said until those who were present told you about it, then this divorce does not count as such. Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him) said: Divorce uttered in a state of severe anger does not count as such, whether it is threefold or a single talaaq, according to the more correct of the two scholarly opinions, if there is proof to support the claim that one was in that state at the time. But if his anger was so intense that he did not know what he was saying or doing, then his divorce does not count as such according to scholarly consensus, as in the case of one who is insane or in a state of intoxication where no committing of sin in involved.
End quote from Majmoo‘ Fataawa Ibn Baaz, 21/275
We have previously discussed the ruling on a divorce issued by one who is angry; please see fatwa no. 45174
A similar case is that of a man who divorces his wife based on something and if it were not for that he would not have divorced her, then he finds out that this matter was not correct, such as if he divorces her thinking that she was having a relationship with another man, then he finds out that she is innocent. In that case, this divorce does not count as such.
See the answer to question no. 36835
To sum up: if the matter is as described, your divorce did not count as such.
And Allah knows best.