38724: Her husband wants her to sit in front of the TV with him
My husband gets annoyed at my reading Qur’aan a lot, as he says, because I am leaving him alone. Will I be sinning if I stop reading Qur’aan for him because he wants me to watch TV with him? If I do not read Qur’aan and I sit with him, will I be sinning whether that is during the day or at night in Ramadaan? Please note that I try to read Qur’aan when he is sleeping or doing something that keeps him busy, and I do not read much, but I am learning tajweed [correct recitation].
There is no blame on you if you read Qur’aan and do a lot of acts of worship, so long as that does not impinge upon your husband’s rights, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible for a woman to fast when her husband is present, except with his permission.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5195; Muslim, 1026.
That is because the husband’s right to physical intimacy is obligatory, so it is not permissible to impinge on that by doing something that is naafil (supererogatory).
The righteous wife should be happy that her husband is interested in her and wants her to sit with him. She should realize that by pleasing him and making him happy she will earn a great reward. So do you best and try to create a balance, and choose times for your worship when your husband is busy or is outside.
With regard to watching TV, it is evil and should be avoided, because it provokes desires and stirs up doubts, and propagates many evils, such as mixing of men and women, uncovering ‘awrahs, and using music and musical instruments. What good there may be in it is outweighed by these great evils. Many of those who tried it and have it in their homes will you tell you that it is difficult to control it and keep away from its evils. Because even the religious programs – which are the best of what is available – are not free from the sound of musical instruments, or else they are presented by women who are clothed yet naked, astray themselves and leading others astray, so how about other programs? And Allaah is the One Whose help we seek.
What your husband has to do is to fear Allaah and make sure his wife and children avoid seeing and hearing these evil things, for he is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded”
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The ruler is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock. A woman is the shepherd of her husband’s household and is responsible for her flock…” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 893; Muslim, 1829.
If he calls you to watch or listen to any of the haraam things that we have mentioned, it is not permissible for you to obey him, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience in disobedience to Allaah; obedience is only with regard to that which is good and proper.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840. Be kind and gentle when you advise him, and ask Allaah to set his heart straight and make him come to his senses.
And Allaah knows best.