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In a discussion among Muslims, we were trying to arrive at a definition of "love" in Islam. Though we are all well aware of the love of Allah and our obligation to love both Him and His Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), we wondered if there is a clear outline of love between humans (similar to the Christian "brotherly love"...NOT the romantic variety). Some posited that "love" lies only within the family, all else is but respect/friend- ship/etc. Others questioned whether love is limited to spouses and/or children. Still others questioned if love can be conditional or not. One idea is that "love" (as the term is commonly used) may even be an 'innovation' of sorts, based on fairy tales and Christian philosophy. Many of us have looked in various sources to seek out an "answer", but no one has found a definitive answer as of yet... Can you help?
Praise be to Allah.
I was very happy to hear that you and your fellow Muslim sisters are studying Islamic issues and trying to find out about Islamic views of love. No doubt, you and your sisters understand the importance of the scholars’ views and referring to them in matters of dispute. I will quote here a number of views about love, so that you will understand the matter better, in sha Allah
Love in Islam may be divided into specific love and general love.
Specific love may be divided into types that are permissible and types that are prohibited.
“But those who believe, love Allah more (than anything else)” [Al-Baqarah 2:165]
“Say: If your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your kindred, the wealth that you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, and the dwellings in which you delight are dearer to you than Allah and His Messenger, and striving hard and fighting in His cause, then wait until Allah brings about His Decision (torment). And Allah guides not the people who are Fasiqun (rebellious, disobedient).” [Al-Tawbah 9:24]
There are also other similar proofs in the Quran and Sunnah.
The love of Allah may also take the form of preferring what Allah loves and wants of His slave over what the slave himself might love and want. So he loves what Allah loves, hates what He hates, takes as friends or regards as enemies for His sake, and adheres to His laws. There are many ways to strengthen this type of love.
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “None of you truly believes until I am more beloved to him than his child, his father and all the people.” (Reported by Muslim, no. 44)
‘Abdullah ibn Hisham (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “We were with the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and he was holding the hand of ‘Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him); ‘Umar said to him: O Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), you are dearer to me than everything except my own self. The Prophet (peace be and blessings upon him) said: No (that is not right), by the One in Whose Hand is my soul, (not) until I am dearer to you than your own self. ‘Umar said to him, now, by Allah, you are dearer to me than my own self. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: Now (you are right), O Umar.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari, no. 6632).
This love is part of loving Allah and is manifested by following the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and giving precedence to his opinion over that of others.
Obedience to Allah is based on the love of Allah. Faith cannot be perfected except in this way, even if one has a lot of prayers and fasting to their credit. ‘Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “I have witnessed at the time of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), none of us would think that he had more right to his own money than his Muslim brother.”
General love is of three types:
For more information, please see Kitab Taysir al-Aziz, Bab wa min al-nas man yattakhidhu min dun-Allahi andadan.
We hope that this explanation makes the matter clearer.