The reprehensible tradition of the husband’s family showing the virginal blood

Praise be to Allah.

Firstly: 

This is a reprehensible tradition and an abhorrent action. It is not permissible for the husband to go along with his family in this matter or to agree to it in word or deed, for a number of reasons, including the following: 

1.

This is one of the marital secrets that are to be kept. Whatever goes on between the spouses in their private relationship, it is not permissible for them to spread it among people or to tell anyone about it?  

2.

This blood is not the sign that distinguishes between a decent woman and others, as is well known, therefore the whole exercise is pointless. 

Please see the answer to question no. 40278. 

3.

If we assume that the husband discovers that his wife is not a virgin, then he is enjoined to conceal that fact and not disclose it to people. What his family are asking him to do is helping in haraam disclosure, not in concealment which is obligatory. 

4.

Another of the evil effects of this reprehensible custom is causing anxiety and stress to both spouses, because the husband is rushed into breaking the hymen and the wife may not be ready on the first night, so he may cause her to bleed heavily and cause resentment in the marital relationship. 

5.

This reprehensible tradition implicitly accuses the woman of immoral action, as they demand her to produce proof of her innocence. 

6.

The least that may be said of this reprehensible tradition is that it is contrary to modesty, because the intimacy that occurs between the spouses should be concealed and it is not permissible to disclose it or announce it. 

This reprehensible tradition should be prevented and fought against. 

Shaykh ‘Ali Mahfooz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

One of the bad traditions is parading around the village with the bride’s chemise stained with virginal blood, and indeed the blood of the crime against this delicate organ on the part of that beast who does not remember that Allaah is watching him with regard to how he treats this poor woman at the most difficult of times. When they parade around with the chemise and when the hymen is broken they say words that would shame anyone who has any shred of humanity. This reprehensible innovation has died out among the rich and the middle classes, but it still remains and is treated as sacred among the poor and lower classes. It is one of the remnants of Jaahiliyyah. End quote. 

Al-Ibdaa’ fi Madaar al-Ibtidaa’ (p. 265), Dar al-I’tisaam. 

And Allaah knows best.