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Ruling on obeying one’s husband in going to mixed leisure facilities

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Publication : 18-06-2002

Views : 14976

Question

My husband wants to go camping during the summer, with our two young daughters. Camping spots are usually near the water, so it includes aquatic activities (among naked kuffar), hiking, cycling, etc. I feel quite uncomfortable with the idea; I just feel that it is inappropriate for a muslimah to do that kind of activities, especially with a long dress and hijab, and I don't want my daughters to get used to that kind of life. I have talked about my feelings to my husband, but he kind of laughed at my feelings, saying that anyway, he wasn't including me in his projects, that he would go alone with our daughters (which I'm totally against), thus dividing the family instead of finding an activity that would please everyone. I see him asking the kuffar around us for good camping spots, and it really gets on my nerves. Am I right or totally wrong?.

Answer

Praise be to Allah.

Going to places where Allaah is disobeyed and in which sacred limits are openly violated for fun and for leisure is considered to be something that is forbidden according to sharee’ah. If women are forbidden to mix with men and get close to them in the mosques – which are the purest places on the face of the earth – then how about these places in which there are kaafirs who are disobeying Allaah by committing all kinds of sins and evil actions. Allaah has described His believing slaves as follows: 

“those who do not bear witness to falsehood, and if they pass by some evil play or evil talk, they pass by it with dignity”

[al-Furqaan 25:72 – interpretation of the meaning]

i.e., they do not attend places of evil or attend promiscuous and immoral gatherings, as was narrated from more than one of the Salaf. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 6/130). By refusing to go with him to these campgrounds where Allaah is disobeyed you are doing the right thing, because there should be no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator. He must also refrain from going to those places. 

There are many kinds of permissible leisure activities. His children are a trust that has been placed with him, and he will be brought to account concerning their upbringing and whether he did what was in their best interests in both spiritual and worldly terms. Undoubtedly taking them with him to those places will be a factor in corrupting his children and spoiling their pure innate nature (fitrah), and making them get used to seeing evil actions. If they get used to that, doing such things will be no big deal to them after that, or at least they will not denounce them. So he should fear Allaah with regard to this great trust and beware of being included among those mentioned in the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Whoever is entrusted by Allaah with the care of those under him and he dies neglecting his flock, Allaah will forbid Paradise to him.” (Narrated by Muslim, 203). 

You must do everything you can to prevent them going with their father if he insists on going, whilst at the same time trying to advise him in the best possible manner, without being harsh in your dealings with him, in the hope that Allaah will open his heart and guide him.

 We ask Allaah to make you steadfast in your protective jealousy (gheerah) and your hatred of that which is haraam, and to help you to adhere to the truth in word and deed. Ameen.

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Source: Islam Q&A