Friday 7 Jumada al-ula 1446 - 8 November 2024
English

Who Comes First in Islam, One’s Wife or Parents?

Question

To whom should a married man give much preference, his mother or his wife?

Summary of answer

The wife takes precedence over the mother in one matter only, and that is spending. If the husband is poor and cannot afford to spend on both his wife and his mother, then his wife comes before his mother.

Answer

Praise be to Allah.

The Muslim should always give preference to his mother , because it says in a Hadith that a man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): “Who among the people is most deserving of my good company?” He said, “Your mother.” He asked, “Then who?” He said, “Your mother.” He asked, “Then who?” He said, “Your mother.” … (Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 5514 and Muslim, 4621)

But the wife takes precedence over the mother in one case, and that is the matter of spending. If the husband cannot afford to spend on both his wife and his mother because he is poor, then in this case he should put his wife before his mother. The Muslim has to give what is due to each person who has a right over him, and he has to help the one who is oppressed. If his mother mistreats his wife, he has to put a stop to it, in a kind and fair manner.

For more details, please see the following answers: 110845 , 43123 , 141628 , 326674 .

And Allah knows best.

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Source: Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid