Praise be to Allah.
We praise Allaah for having blessed you and guided you to obey Him and please Him, and that your husband has been guided to change the way he treats you. We hope that this will give you hope that your husband will improve and mend his ways, in sha Allah.
You should note that a righteous woman can change many of her husband’s attitude and habits, if she goes about doing so in a wise and kindly manner, without being hasty.
Some husbands are put off by repeated advice from their wives, especially if that is in the presence of their children, because they may see that as an affront to their dignity or a belittling of their character.
Hence you should pay proper attention to that, and choose the right moment to advise him from time to time. You should also be kind and loving towards him when offering advice, in the hope that he will respond. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Invite (mankind, O Muhammad) to the way of your Lord (i.e. Islam) with wisdom (i.e. with the Divine Revelation and the Qur’aan) and fair preaching, and argue with them in a way that is better”
[al-Nahl 16:125]
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Kindness is not present in a thing but it makes it beautiful, and it is not missing from a thing but it makes it ugly.” (Narrated by Muslim, 2594, from the hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her).
The husband is the most deserving of people to be treated kindly, because of his status and position.
We advise you to use various means to accomplish your mission, such as giving him some tapes and books, or bringing them home and leaving them near him, turning to Allaah and asking Him to put things right between you and to open your husband’s heart so that he will know the truth and act in accordance with it.
And Allaah knows best.
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