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Are there righteous deeds that a pregnant woman in particular can do?

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Publication : 23-11-2023

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Question

I am pregnant, and I ask Allah to bless me with a righteous child. I would like to know whether there are any righteous deeds that I can do when I am pregnant?

Answer

Praise be to Allah.

Perhaps the most important righteous deed that a pregnant woman can do and pay attention to is learning useful methods of raising children, reading trustworthy books about child-rearing, and listening to specialist people of knowledge who are known to be sincere. That is because giving a child a good upbringing is the most important duty that parents can do for their children, and it cannot be matched by accumulating wealth, buying what they need or anything else, to the extent that a wise person said:

The best thing that parents can leave for their children is a praiseworthy attitude, good manners and righteous friends.

This was quoted by Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr in Bahjat al-Majalis (p. 18). Something similar was also narrated in a mursal hadith. See: al-Silsilah al-Da‘ifah (no. 1121).

No one should think that instilling good manners and a good attitude is something easy; rather this refers to a set of manners and attitudes that a person cannot attain except through experience, care and discipline. If the parents rely on the child learning about good manners and good attitudes by himself, then they are being careless and negligent towards their children.

Al-Mawardi (may Allah have mercy on him) said:

You should understand that the child is born with some characteristics and manners, so the praiseworthy and pleasing characteristics need to be polished and refined, because the praiseworthy characteristics have opposites which could be strengthened through whims and desires. If the parent fails to discipline the child and leaves the development of manners and attitudes to the child’s reason, in the hope that he will naturally adhere to good characteristics and manners, and he gives up striving, he will end up a remorseful loser and the child will grow up with no manners or discipline, behaving like ignorant people. That is because good manners are acquired through experience or learned from customs that are regarded as good, and each community will vary in that regard. That is not something that can be attained through reason or letting the child behave according to his nature so that he can learn through experience and pain. And it cannot be learned through experience in dealing with others, then letting the child’s reason decide about these issues. If reason were sufficient to learn about good manners and attitudes, then the Prophets of Allah, may He be exalted, would have had no need for revealed texts, and it would have been sufficient for them to rely on their reason. It was narrated from the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) that he said: “I have been sent to perfect noble characteristics.”(Adab al-Dunya wa’l-Din  p. 286).

That – undoubtedly – is what is referred to in the verse in which Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

{O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones}[Al-Tahrim 66:6].

If parents had sufficient awareness of this matter, and they realised how serious the issue of raising a child, disciplining him and teaching him good manners is, the entire condition of the ummah could be changed completely and would become better and more sound, by Allah’s leave.

We also advise the pregnant woman to adhere to religious duties, uphold regular prayer, and offer a great deal of supplication, asking Allah, may He be exalted, for a righteous child who honours his parents and for well-being in this world and the hereafter, for no one is ever given anything better than well-being. We do not know of any particular act of worship that is recommended in Islamic teachings specifically for the pregnant woman and not for others.

You can learn a lot from the book Mas’uliyat al-Ab al-Muslim nahwa al-Walad fi Marhalat al-Tufulah by ‘Adnan Salih Baharith.

And Allah knows best.

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Source: Islam Q&A