Praise be to Allah.
You should understand – may Allah keep you safe and sound – that it is possible, on the basis of real-life experience and rational thinking, for a father to form a bond with a child other than his own that is stronger than his bond with his own child, because of spending a great deal of time with him, or because the way the child acts and speaks indicates that the child is attached to that man in a manner that he does not see in his own child.
It is also possible that a child does not bond with his father, even if they live in the same house, either because the father treats him harshly or neglects him. These are natural feelings that fathers and children may feel in such circumstances.
Yet despite that, the natural inclination that Allah has instilled in people remains deeply rooted in the soul of the father and the soul of the son, and this prevents the father from becoming no more than a stranger like other people, and prevents the son from becoming a stranger like other children.
No matter what happens, this natural inclination that Allah has instilled in people will remain deep in your child’s heart, and he will not be able to ward it off or ignore it under any circumstances.
Moreover, it will increase in strength and depth if you show love to him, let him know that you care for him and treat him kindly.
The point is that it is important for you to be a positive and active presence in your child’s life – in this situation – and you cannot do without that. So you should strive to see him regularly and do not stop visiting him, following his progress and showing him that you are keen to see him by all possible means.
You should also strive to show your love for him in words and deeds and in the way in which you interact with him.
You should show him that you appreciate him and praise him every time you meet him; you should encourage him, support his skills and hobbies that are dear to his heart, be gentle when advising him, and show him your disapproval in a gentle and loving manner when he behaves in a manner that is not appropriate.
And Allah knows best.
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