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Can the husband wash his wife if she dies? By the same token, can the wife wash her husband if he dies?
Praise be to Allah.
It is permissible for a man to wash his wife , and for a woman to wash her husband, even if the woman is observing `Iddah following a revocable divorce .
The fact that it is permissible for a man to wash his wife is indicated by the Hadith of `Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) came back from a funeral in Al-Baqi` and I had a headache and was saying, Oh my head. He said, “Rather, I should say, Oh my head. It will not matter if you die before me, for I will wash you and shroud you, then I will offer the funeral prayer for you and bury you.” (Narrated by Ahmad, 25380; Ibn Majah, 1456; classed as authentic by Shaykh Al-Albani in Sahih Ibn Majah, 1/247)
It was narrated from Asma’ bint `Umays (may Allah be pleased with her) that Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) left instructions that `Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) should wash her. (Narrated by Ash-Shafi`i, 1/312; Ad-Daraqutni, 2/79; Al-Bayhaqi, 3/396. Its Isnaad (chain of narration) was classed as spound by Ash-Shawkani in Nayl Al-Awtar, 4/35)
Ash-Shawkani (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “The words of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), “for I will wash you”, indicate that a wife may be washed by her husband if she dies.” (Nayl Al-Awtar, 4/35)
As-San`ani (may Allah have mercy on him) said concerning the Hadith of Asma’ (may Allah be pleased with her): “This indicates that this was something that was well-known during the life of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him).” (Subul As-Salam, 1/478)
This is also the view of the majority of scholars (may Allah have mercy on them).
An-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “With regard to washing his wife, it is permissible in our opinion and according to the majority of scholars. This was narrated by Ibn Al-Mundhir from `Alqamah, Jabir ibn Zayd, `Abd Ar-Rahman ibn Al-Aswad,… Malik, Al-Awza`i, Ahmad and Ishaq (may Allah have mercy on them). It is also the view of `Ata’, Dawud and Ibn Al-Mundhir. Abu Hanifah and Ath-Thawri stated that he cannot wash her; this was also narrated from Al-Awza`i. They quoted as evidence the fact that the marriage has ended (with the death of one of the spouses), so it is akin to a complete and irrevocable divorce.” (Sharh Al-Muhadhdhab, 5/122)
In Majmu` Fatawa Ash-Shaykh Ibn Baz (may Allah have mercy on him), 13/109, it says:
Some of the jurists were of the view that the marital relationship comes to an end with death; what is your view on this issue?
He replied:
“This is a view that is contrary to the Sunnah, so no attention should be paid to it.”
With regard to a woman washing her husband , this is supported by the Hadith of `Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: If I had known beforehand what I know now, no one would have washed the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) but his wives. (Narrated by Abu Dawud, 3141; classed as authentic by Shaykh Al-Albani (may Allah have mercy on him) in Ahkam Al-Jana’iz, 1/49)
An-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “Ibn Al-Mundhir narrated in his two books, Al-Ishraf and Kitab Al-Ijma`, that the Ummah unanimously agreed that a woman may wash her husband. Others also narrated that there is consensus on this point.” (Sharh Al-Muhadhdhab, 5/114)
And Allah knows best.