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Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
We ask Allaah to cleanse his heart and body, and to guide him to the best of attitudes, words and deeds.
Secondly:
It should be noted that this action of his comes under the heading of perversion. It is not by doing such actions that the Muslim expresses gratitude to his Lord, may He be glorified and exalted, and it is not in this manner that the Muslim will preserve the great blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon him. He should give up these perverse actions which go against the sound nature that Allaah has instilled in man, and go against all revealed laws, and for which everyone of sound mind will hate him.
Thirdly:
It should be noted that such perverse actions are a sign of an idle mind, and he has to give up the things that led him to behave in the manner of perverts. Perhaps among these reasons – and the greatest of them – is having a heart that is devoid of faith, and a soul that is devoid of shyness before Allaah and His angels, as well as watching haraam TV series, movies and perverse actions, and having a life that is devoid of useful work, not wanting to get married and liking to stay alone, and many other such reasons which may cause a man to fall into bad ways.
Fourthly:
He should hasten to give up this perverse action and repent to his Lord. He must strive to furnish his heart with faith and fill his life with righteous deeds and actions that will benefit his spiritual and worldly interests. He must be keen to hasten to protect himself by means of marriage to a righteous woman who will help him to remain chaste and obey his Lord, and he must stop watching haraam things or staying alone which makes it easy for him to fall into immoral ways.
Fifthly:
He should also note that he is causing physical and psychological harm to himself. He will see the negative consequences of what he is doing on his body after a while, and he will see how much psychological pain he will suffer, which will deprive him of sleep and prevent him from enjoying his food and drink. He will see how much he will suffer of physical pain which will prevent him from relieving himself with ease, and how much he will suffer of infections and ulcers if he persists in this perverse action of his.
Sixthly:
He needs someone to explain to him that what he is doing is haraam, and to remind him and exhort him (to follow the right path).
The one who is afflicted with any of these haraam actions has to remember two things:
1-To feel shy before Allaah and his angels and before himself too.
2-To fear death and to fear lest Allaah causes him to die when he is doing that to himself.
With regard to shyness:
We know that he believes that Allaah can see him in all situations, but perhaps he forgets about that at the time when he is committing this sin. If this belief becomes established in his heart, with time he will begin to feel shy of Allaah seeing him falling short in obedience or committing a sin. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Knows he not that Allaah does see (what he does)?”
[al-‘Alaq 96:14]
“And indeed We have created man, and We know what his ownself whispers to him. And We are nearer to him than his jugular vein (by Our Knowledge)”
[Qaaf 50:16]
‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: Feel shy before Allaah is the true sense of the word. They said: We feel shy before Allaah. He said: That is not the way; the one who feels shy before Allaah in the true sense of the word should be watchful of his mind and whatever enters it, and he should be watchful of his stomach and whatever enters it, and he should remember death and decay. Whoever hopes for the reward in the Hereafter would shun the temptation of this world. Whoever does that is shy before Allaah in the true sense of the word.
Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1724.
He believes that Allaah has appointed noble angels over him who can see him and hear him, and they record what he does of good deeds and bad deeds, and they never leave him in any situation. If he feels shy of them, he will give up the perverse actions that he is doing.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“But verily, over you (are appointed angels in charge of mankind) to watch you,
11. Kiraaman (Honourable) Kaatibeen —writing down (your deeds),
12. They know all that you do”
[al-Infitaar 82:10-12]
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
i.e., feel shy before these honourable watchers and respect them; spare them from seeing you do anything which you would not want those who are like you to see you doing, for the angels are offended by that which offends the sons of Adam. If the son of Adam would be offended by one who commits immoral actions and sins in front of him, even if he might also do something similar, then how do you think the honourable recording angels will be offended?
Al-Jawaab al-Kaafi, p. 75
One of the salaf said: With you are those who never leave you, so feel shy of them and respect them.
He would feel shy of doing that in front of people, so how can he not feel shy before Allaah and His angels?
With regard to death:
He should remember that he does not know when the Angel of Death will come to him to take his soul, and he does not know the situation that he will be in at that time. Would he like his death to come now, before he repents? Would he like his soul to be taken when he is doing this perverse action? Does he not know that deeds are judged according to a person’s final deeds? Does he not know that Allaah will raise the people in the same condition that they died? What will his situation be when he emerges from his grave on the Day of Resurrection? What will he say to his Lord when he stands before Him?
One of the salaf said: There are two things that put an end of enjoyment of this world for me: remembering death, and remembering the standing before Allaah, may He be exalted.
‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Azeez (may Allaah have mercy on him) used to gather the scholars and they would talk about death, the Resurrection and the Hereafter, and they would weep so much that it was as if there was a funeral taking place before them.
One of the salaf said: The one who remembers death is honoured with three things: hastening to repent, contentment of heart and energy for worship. Whoever forgets death is punished with three things: delaying repentance, not being content with enough, and laziness in worship.
It should be noted that a good end is only granted to the one who was righteous both inwardly and outwardly, and a bad end is given to one who was inwardly corrupt, or who persisted in major sins. It should be noted that a man will die as he lived, and his life will end in the manner that he persisted in and did not give up.
It was said to a man who was in the throes of death: “Say Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah.” And he started singing, because he used to be infatuated by singing. It was said to a drinker when he was dying: “Say Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah,” and he started saying: “Drink and pour me some.”
Perhaps what we have mentioned is sufficient to make him give up his evil deeds and come back to his Lord, and to ask Him to help him and guide him. We have given more advice and suggestions in the answer to question no. 20068, which we hope he will read too.
We ask Allaah to guide him and set his affairs straight.
And Allaah is the Source of strength.