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To be a true believer 1 quality is to love for your brother what you love for yourself. Alhamdulillah this is easy to do with my blood brother, but very difficult to do this for any of my muslim brothers except a few, the reason being is that when i see my muslim brother better than me in anything i feel jealous, i think it's pride(brother i make du’a to Allah to forgive me for feeling like this but when i see my muslim brother again,this feeling comes back again)
I want to feel happy seeing my muslim brother prosper and i want to feel sad when he's sad.but whenever i see people praising my muslim brother i feel jealous.
i also feel like wanting for my muslim brother janatul ferdose but whenever my muslim brother tells me something which will benefit me for deen, i want to practice it but saytan comes and tell me that if i practice it then my muslim brother would get the same rewards as i would and so his stage will be higher than mine in jannah, my nafs sometimes fall for this trap. i would like to know how i can get total cure from this problem.
Praise be to Allah.
What every Muslim is obliged to do, as you mentioned, is to love for his brother what he loves for himself of good things, and to hate for his brother what he hates for himself of bad things. This does not mean that he cannot like for himself what he likes for others. If he sees that his brother has something that he does not, and he wishes that he had it too, this is ghibtah (envy that is free from malice); if he wishes that the blessing would be taken away from them, this is called hasad (destructive jealousy).
The Muslim needs to strive against his own self (jihad al-nafs) so that his heart will be free of jealousy towards his Muslim brothers. If he sincerely loves his brothers, most of these problems from which he is suffering will disappear. When the Muslim realizes how great his virtue and status will be when he loves his brothers and loves good things for them, and when he knows how great his reward will be if he treats them well, this will motivate him to treat them well in all ways, and to strive to benefit his brothers instead of being preoccupied with jealous thoughts of what they have and he doesn’t. (Shaykh Muhammad al-Duwaysh)
You have to think long and hard about the words of Allah (interpretation of the meaning):
“That is the Grace of Allah which He bestows on whom He wills.” [al-Maidah 5:54]
“It is We Who portion out between them their livelihood in this world, and We raised some of them above others in ranks, so that some may employ others in their work.” [al-Zukhruf 43:32]
Hasad (destructive jealousy ) causes a great deal of harm in this world and in the Hereafter. Al-Tirmidhi narrated from al-Zubayr ibn al-'Awwam that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
“There has come to you the disease of the nations before you, jealousy and hatred. This is the ‘shaver’ (destroyer); I do not say that it shaves hair, but that it shaves (destroys) faith. By the One in Whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen love between you? Spread (the greeting of) salam amongst yourselves.” (A hasan hadith. Jami’ al-Tirmidhi, 2434).
Concerning the meaning of the phrase “it shaves (destroys) faith”, al-Tibi said: “i.e., hatred takes away faith like a razor takes away hair.” (Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi bi Sharh Jami’ al-Tirmidhi).
It seems, my brother, that you know the ruling and are aware of the consequences, and that you want to rid yourself of this blameworthy characteristic. Here are some solutions for you.
“Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds.” [Hud 11:114]
[Translator’s note: a well-known book of sirah which is available in English is “Al-Rahiq al-Makhtum (the Sealed Nectar) – Biography of the Noble Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), by Safi-ur-Rahman al-Mubarakpuri]
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:
“Nobody is free from hasad, but the noble person hides it whilst the base person shows it.” (Amrad al-Qulub). A person will not be brought to account for whatever crosses his mind, but he will be brought to account for what he says and does. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Allah will forgive my ummah for their mistakes, what they forget and what they are forced to do.” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 2033)
Hasad is the result of hatred, whose opposite is love, the way of which is giving gifts and spreading (the greeting of) salam, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “You will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen love between you? Spread (the greeting of) salam amongst yourselves.” (Narrated by Muslim, 81)
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said in his book Amrad al-Qulub (diseases of the heart):
“Whoever finds in himself any hasad towards another has to try to neutralize it by means of taqwa (piety, consciousness of Allah) and sabr (patience). So he should hate that (the feeling of hasad) in himself… But the one who does wrong to his brother by word or deed will be punished for that. The one who fears Allah and is patient, however, is not included among the wrongdoers, and Allah will benefit him by his taqwa.”
And Allah knows best.